I've been so busy working out with my new P90X program, I haven't had time to blog about it. : )
This has been an interesting three weeks. The new program is a lot of fun and I can already feel my body changing shape. The problem is the scale isn't changing and that has been so discouraging for me.
I should be happy that my jeans are getting looser and looser, and that I've had some compliments, but insecurity and frustration moved in instead. My husband had a promotion ceremony at work this week, and they took pictures of our family. I was so disappointed when I saw the pictures. I felt pretty and skinny in my new dress. Then I saw the pictures and saw I still have a long way to go. The picture was so different than the picture in my head. It was discouraging.
It has been a time of more lessons to learn. I keep repeating this over and over again, but I want this to be long-term change, so I have to be aware of the ah-ha moments along the way.
Here's some:
1. Working out is not an excuse to overeat. I still need to be disciplined, especially during the trying to lose weight phase. I'm really good at maintaining because I instinctively make up for the calorie deficit.
2. This is a process and WILL TAKE TIME! I want to be fit and perfect NOW!!!! If it is going to be lasting, it won't happen overnight.
This blog post by Tracie Miles was so helpful to me this week. There will continue to be victories and setbacks. I'm not going to be "magically" cured from my weight battle. It will be a life long effort, and I need to accept that, to persevere and keep moving forward.
3. I need to be aware when I experience success. Whenever I start becoming successful, self-sabotage creeps in to undermine my efforts. I get overconfident.
4. I need to enjoy the progress I've made and quit always living for a future me. My sense of worth and value can't be measured by my perception of my outward beauty. I want so much to be beautiful, but real beauty will come when Jesus shines out of me. There's is nothing wrong with trying to lose weight and to take care of this body, but my worth is not equal to my appearance or the number on the scale.
I'm getting excited for my 5K race on Saturday. I've been doing the Couch to 5K plan and can now run for 30 minutes without stopping. It is my favorite form of exercise right now. It feels so good to have come so far- going from running for 60 seconds to running 30 minutes.
I'm nursing a really sore back, so I'm praying it will heal before Saturday morning. I'll let you know how the race goes. Thanks to all of you who are cheering me on. It means so much to me.