Made to Crave

Last year, my life took a very busy and stressful turn, and one of the first things to go was keeping up with blogging, especially my fitness blog. 

I've been terrible about keeping up on this blog, and it is virtual reflection of how successful I've been at keeping up on my fitness journey in real life.  Not so hot.  : (   

With the New Year came a desire to rediscover the joy of blogging.  And I'm doing that on my Everyday Becky blog.  For now, it is easier for me to use Everyday Becky to blog about everything in my everyday- including my fitness journey- instead of trying to maintain two blogs. 

And right now on Everyday Becky, I'm running a 10 week series called "Made to Crave" Mondays.  I'm blogging every Monday about a new book by Lysa TerKeurst, and the impact it is having on my personal weight loss journey. 

I hope you'll join me over on that blog.  Lysa is a guest blogger today and I think you'll like the insight she has about facing temptation and preparing ahead for it.  It hit home for me.  See you over there. 

You can click here to get to Everyday Becky. 

Love,
Becky  

I Kissed Dieting Goodbye...

And it is SO scary!

In the past, when I found myself in the place I am now- uncomfortable in my clothes and ashamed of the extra weight, my "go to" plan was the next diet. I was desperate to change NOW!!

But, it became harder and harder to start again. And it became harder and harder to keep it off.

As I continue in this quest for lasting change, I'm learning that all of the dieting in my past has taken a toll on my health and metabolism. I'm learning that only 2% of people who lose weight actually keep it off. If I want to be a part of the "2% Club", I'm going to have to stop dieting and start making lasting changes in my lifestyle, my behavior, and my thinking. Only then will I succeed in this journey and stop gaining it all back again.

In the past, I laughed at the claim that if I'd only make a few lifestyle changes, I could stop dieting. It always seemed like an excuse to be lazy and that the only real way to lose the weight once it was there was to diet. I didn't have the patience to lose it slowly. I was too embarrassed and felt like my life would end if I didn't get the fat off now!

The cost of that mentality was a screwed up metabolism and yet more failure.

Here I am again. But I'm not going on a diet.

I lost a 1/2 pound last week. That isn't much, but I also didn't diet last week. I rode my bike instead of driving my car when I could. I ate fruit and vegetables. I tried to cut back on sugar and white flour, and I drank a lot of water. I'm trying so hard to be patient, to be the tortoise instead of the hare so I can win the race. It is hard. I still feel desperate for change. I still wish it could be fast, but I want to keep it off even more.

These are the books I'm currently reading. I thought I knew everything there was to know about losing weight. These books are showing me I have much to learn about living a healthy life:

Question: Do you think it is possible to lose weight without dieting?

Trying Something New

The time between 3:00 and 5:00 in the afternoon is a danger zone for me and my fitness goals. I start each day with the greatest intentions of sticking to my eating plan, and then 3:00 rolls around. My energy crashes, I feel exhausted, and I feel like I NEED to eat.

Even if I try to eat something small and healthy, it seems to trigger an afternoon binge. It's been so discouraging! I've been wondering how to change things to survive that time of day.

Last week, a friend sent an email that had a saying in it that I'd heard before:

You should eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince, and dinner like a beggar.

Reading it this time, made me wonder if changing the order of my meals might help me with this afternoon dip. So I'm trying to eat a dinner size meal at lunch, a small afternoon snack that includes a healthy carb (like an apple) and a lean protein (like a hard boiled egg or string cheese) and then when I would have eaten dinner, I'm having a light lunch size meal.

I've got high hopes. I'll let you know if the change does any good for me. I'd love to hear if there are any other tips for increasing energy and curbing appetite for that time of day.

Babysteps

I'm trying to pick myself up, shake off the (figurative) snow from the latest avalanche, and start climbing again. I want to face victory and the top of the mountain, instead of laying here feeling sorry for myself and focusing on my failure and defeat.

I'm tackling this mountain again with babysteps. One new step a week.

Last week, I took Babystep #1: I started the "Couch to 5K" running plan. I printed the plan, put it on the fridge, and wrote the race date on it. My favorite part is marking off each workout with a big x. I'm proud to say, the first three workouts are checked off.

Today, I began Babystep #2: Deal with my sugar addiction.

I'm going sugar free from now until Easter to get it out of my system. This week's focus will be getting through my sugar cravings and thinking about how to deal with this issue.

For breakfast, I had oatmeal sweetened with raisins instead of brown sugar and added a handful of peanuts for protein. Feeling great about it so far.

I'll begin Babystep #3 next week.

Avalanche on the Mountain

In this journey I call "Climbing My Personal Mount Everest," I've come to the conclusion that this is going to be a continuous battle.

I have so far to go in figuring out how to have a consistent fit lifestyle and to have right thinking about and control over food.

The term yo-yo dieter could not be a better way to describe me. Or maybe an accordion-

Chubby, thin, chubby, chubbier, thin, than chubby again. In-out-in-out.
Up and down the scale.

My most recent attempts to climb the mountain have been a similar story-

• October 2008 - October 2009: Lost 50 pounds of post pregnancy weight.
• Wanted to lose 10 more before Thanksgiving, but then AVALANCHE!!! Watch out below!Gained 20 by the end of the holidays instead.
• January 2010, tried Nutri System again and lost 10 pounds. Yay! Only 10 more to get back to where I was in October.
• Oops... : ( Another avalanche on the mountain- 10 pounds are back on already.

Ugh! The winter blues and stress struck and food became a comfort and escape once again.

(Next year I will not begin the Fall and Winter season without a plan! The same thing happens every year! I'm tired of it.)

I know there are so many resources available to me as a Christian to win this battle, not in my strength, but His. That's my most recent prayer, "Show me how to tap into the strength, grace, and victory I have in You in order to overcome me."

I've made a positive step in the right direction- I started the Couch to 5K plan again. The two mini jog/walks I've been on so far make me feel like I'm coming out of hibernation. I love to run! I've got my eye on a 5K race in May and then hopefully more races over the summer.

Anyone still out there? : )

Ten Pound Tuesday: It Will Happen

Before Thanksgiving, huh?

Has anyone else come to the realization that all ten pounds might not be off before Thanksgiving?

I had the greatest of intentions- Lose 10 pounds before Thanksgiving. Instead, I gained a few and then maintained. And now it is only two weeks and a few days before Thanksgiving. It would take a serious grapefruit diet or fast to get ten pounds off by then, and that would be contrary to my "lasting change" goal.

I still want to encourage those of you who worked hard to get there by Thanksgiving. Here's me cheering you on, "YOU CAN DO IT!!!!" I'm so impressed by your ability to stick with it and stay focused. You're awesome.

And for those of us who aren't going to make it by Thanksgiving, I want to cheer us on, "WE CAN DO IT!!!!" Just not by Thanksgiving, but I'm determined. If I don't QUIT, it will happen. So my Ten Pound Tuesday is going to keep going until I get there. I hope some of you faithful readers will keep at it with me until we reach the finish line.

All of the encouragement and cheering me on last week helped me more than you can know. I'm working on getting my head back where it needs to be.

Here's some quotes from The Dieter's Prayer Book that have been an encouragement this week:

The most impacting chapter was number 7: "The Trouble with Denial."

The author quotes Dr. Phil in this chapter, "You cannot afford the luxury of defensiveness, and you cannot afford the luxury of lies and denial. Denial after all, is what kills dreams. It kills hope. It kills what might have a real chance to overcome a problem had the solution just been pursued in time."

I had to face again that I am my worst enemy. Not in a beating myself up kind of way, but I had to ask myself, "How am I getting in the way?" It's funny. Every time I want something or ask for something from God, His answer seems to be that I need change at the heart level first.

Ask God if there is any corner of your heart that you keep in the shadows of denial.

Is denial denying me success and health? (pg. 24)

I've just been trying to honestly look at what I do and think and feel that keeps me from crossing that finish line that I've been working so hard to cross. What barriers have I put up myself.

Chapter 10 was awesome, too: More Than Conquerors

Do you feel like a conqueror today? You are! Even if you feel defeated and victory seems far away. If there's one truth you cling to in the coming months, let it be this: Nothing- no amount of fat or failure!- can separate you from God's love or rob you of the conquering power you inherited from Him. (pg. 30)

Remember- It Will Happen!

Here's to a successful, more than conquerors, not letting myself get in the way week! : )

Thank You

Wow. All of your comments were so encouraging and helpful. You each gave me something to think about.

God is doing a lot of work on me from the inside out again. : ) I think I've made a good turn in the right direction again when it comes to this struggle with eating. I've decided it is something that will never be easy for me, but will be something God uses in my life to refine me and keep me close to Him.

I'm winning again in the battle of Becky vs. the Halloween candy, too, which is a big step! I thought it was a hopeless cause there for awhile. : )

Hope you all are having a great weekend.